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And there isn't much more to it than that.

Basically I have completely lost the plot. No idea what I'm doing, got no structure or clear endgame at all. Been feeling afraid and and anxious about my work, even more so about keeping up to date with other people's work, just sealing myself off from the outside like a pretty little blue clam. A lot of self-doubt and a consuming need to do work but not able to see a full picture, uphold process or structure, resulting in little to trash.

Either way, I figure the best way to get out of it is to keep moving my hand while thinking about what I want to get out of my art, and think of how not to be so afraid of every part of it. And make myself get back to keeping up with the peeps whose work I do enjoy.
Mongol eagles
"One by one we light the candles of this show
One by one, enter the theatre of the primal birth
Silently watch the planetary curtain go down
Laugh and rejoice as the powerful play greets you tonight
Dance to the whistle, to the play, to the story, to infinite encores
Laugh at the royalty with sad crowns and repeat the chorus once more"

- 'Edema Ruh', Nightwish

Hello one and all. I have been largely absent from DA for a while now and felt I needed to make my existence reminded.

This is the main result of what I've been doing for the past week since school started. We were given a assignment to create an concept based on a assigned culture and atmosphere, featuring a animal character, object, and landscape, sheets of references, thumbnails and sketches, and a T-pose - all in colour. To be honest I made a mess of it, but I think this came out pretty decent.
I am probably hanging myself by bursting out, but I needed to react for a little bit.

I really do not like the Assassin's Creed film. Not because it's qualitatively bad, it's actually a fairly watchable piece of cinema with cool effects, decent story, and very good actors and cinematography and atmosphere.

BUT it's a paraphrase of the creation of ISIS, and the assassin's are ISIS.

ISIS are the good guys.

The US military accidentally created ISIS by taking all the experienced soldiers, radical spiritual leaders and riled masses, and putting them all in the same prison. Letting them talk to one-another and get organised into a today dying but nevertheless influential terror organisation that influences our opinions on Muslims across the world and letting the story of every ghetto ever repeat itself, only now with a flood wave of refugees from these war-torn countries without jobs or social security. ISIS is bad. Using their history as the backbone for a romanticised Good/Evil film is abhorrent. But that is what happened in Assassin's Creed. the wealthy, shadowy elite that wants to control the world tracks down the heirs of past assassins, place these individually harmless nobodies in a prison, lets them experience assassination through their ancestors and thereby teaching them a conceited code of ethics and superior battle prowess. And then they all escape in the end.

Without spoiling anything the movie is also riddled with less than savoury implications. I've never liked movies that play on victim culture - I barely like Fight Club - but when you consider the step by step retelling of ISIS's creation several other parts of the movie makes it all tasteless. There's a sense throughout the film it is your past who decides who you are through your genetic code. I can subscribe to that, I very much believe in hereditary behaviour, but when that becomes synonymous with sins/virtues of the father and political conviction running through your blood I am out. They also put a very contemporary problem on a knife's edge and paint it in black and white which is an affront. Basically the moral of the movie is we can either have violent chaos or slave-like peace. And tying in with the belonging-by-blood moral there is a sort of positive racism running through it that paints victim culture in a positive light. One character tells our protagonist about how the assassins started, that they were society's outcasts and labelled as thieves and murderers and overall filth, but they used this as a mask to hide a strong conviction of right and wrong, honour and character. That just sounds like ghetto moral to me, brainwashing by oppression.

I'm probably forgetting more than I can to do more than spout claims and words, but I left the cinema with very poor taste in my mouth and I needed to react or I'd explode.

Sorry if I got something wrong.

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As the header says. There's not been much going on, and in a way there has been as well. But mostly not.

I'm seeing a shrink now, which is good. Largely I feel better, as long as I'm not pushing myself. Fuck.
In the passing days I don't feel much like a black miasma is surrounding me but I have been bored. I call that improvement even if straining myself still makes me anxious. Small steps is bringing me forwards still. Today I adopted a too reasonable schedule of two hours of work, with a break every ten minutes. It feels much too reasonable for what I should be outputting but I remind myself this is about what I need rather than rise up to expectations. That helps me deal with it and I think this desire I have acquired of not wanting to grow complacent is a positive sign.

Next week the school will start moving from our old locales to the ones up by the school proper. Up until now the art school and folk high school have been on different sides of the city, but someone decided six months ago the kindergarten adjacent to the folk high school should switch place with the art school. Not sure I much like the idea of having to walk some kilometre to school every day next year instead of the few hundred metres I've been used to, but interesting week ahead of me. While our stuff is being moved we'll need to bus to a different city every day and use the locales there, so I have a proper school schedule for the first time in three years. Slightly geeky thing, our substitute school is a castle. :) We're also doing computer graphics while we're there, so that should be interesting.

Helliden castle and folk high school.

Beyond that everything is fine. Christmas calendar is better than years past, Got some interesting games and albums to look forwards to next year, found Putlocker... I'd like to be able to keep a tidy apartment and eat better and look up the prices and times for local rock climbing walls and keep better track on all the art and comics I love over here, but all in all I think I'm doing fine.

So DA. Been a while. Think it's the third time I say that. I did start doing these journals with the additional purpose of keeping track on everything and criticise constructively and praise or degrade but I have not been doing a good job of that. Not that I have had any need to but still. So let's get to it.

Let's start with me first. I know...Me?! Who'd've thought? :) A week or two ago :iconhattonslayden: gave me a job after I realised I did much better on tasks than personal initiative; "Draw Judy Hopps in the style of Alphonse Mucha". I liked that even if I was beating myself up with how long it took me, but I also had no idea what I was doing and was coming up with stuff as I went along. I like Judy Hopps and I like Alphonse Mucha and all in all I liked the job. :) It was different from what I usually do with elements I liked and I think it turned out pretty well. It's not just a personal opinion though, it has gotten more attention than all the other stuff I've done for the past three or four months put together in just a few days. A lot of that is of course down to Zootropolis being popular but I think much of it also has to do with it being digital instead of traditional. I may need to put more effort in with it. :D

Judy Muchanised by IchorData

:iconspintherella: I do like getting there first, but I'm also self-centred. ^^; Anyway, this time Norwegian spider bunny has a double-wammy going. There's both Inter Schminter and this new adorable little comic called Shadow Man and Lady Light. Let's start with the latest IS update.
In short we finally find out the gist of what happened Max those years ago, after some adorable don't-give-a-fuck crazy. :XD: That post-scratch face... Spider lady has it for a icon at the moment. And Nick laying down the law for the uppity little brat. He's gone all mature and authoritative in the AU's. :) Which reminds me it's been a while since I read Zis.
Back to the comic, I always try looking for things to be improved and fixed for whatever I'm looking at to be made better, but I feel I have to strain myself to really find anything off with this bit. I mean "Everything Wrong With.." strain myself, so I won't bother, Instead there are all positives. :) I like the way the conversation floats along. It's easy to follow and to the point and I feel no real hurdles in it anywhere. I wouldn't say it flows all natural-like because I can't imagine a conversation going this smoothly, but it's all part of the feel of the comic I feel. I don't question it for the same reason I don't question porn or action or Christmas movies - because it's part of the genre and helps create the feeling you're after. :) There, I have dissected a frog.
It's all lovely, want to see more. :)
"Explaining a joke is comparable to dissecting a frog. No one is that interested, and you kill a frog."
    - Jimmy Carr on the theory of jokes.

Inter schminter #132 by IchorData
Aww, ado-obs... :D

Now let's move on to her new little comic project. I say comic but I mean storyboard. There's definitely a difference between those. :D In short, her school class needs to make an animation and she made a story she presented as a storyboard/comic, so we will see these thingies come alive with motion later on. :) It's a very sweet little thing with different worlds and people and opposites attracting and smashing through walls and it's all adorable and feelsy.
Why have I become a 13 year old girl?
It is really pretty. Go and read it. :)
Untitled-1-Recovered by IchorData

:iconvanheist: I'm still very curious to see where this is going, especially with so many things established already. Will we see things tied together? Will things be changed and altered? Has everything we know been nullified and useless? Is reality as we know it over..? I don't think so, because I really know nothing more than there is a amazingly hot muscle lady with a funny accent who can turn into Godzilla, a very smart brainiac, and this little punk milling about in each other's lives, having funny adventures. Which has been enough to keep my interest, being funny and cute and hot, but this has more materia I think. For one thing the punk seems to have grown a pair and doesn't seem as annoying and childish as before.

At the very least we will be seeing old friends. :) Yams!

Also, this is a better Christmas carol.

Santa Baby by VanHeist

I've been wanting to do a take on more abstract illustration as well. I thought I might start with :iconjochenschilling: because he usually does really cool stuff. Like this one. It's a CD cover basically, but it's better than most CD covers I have seen. I'm not sure but there is something about it which makes it seem almost like an artwork instead of an illustration (and where does the limit go? Some argue Alphonse Mucha wasn't an artist). It's odd and unique, how he's managed to make what is clearly clipped and cropped into a functional whole, while also maintaining a consistent atmosphere in all the parts of the image. It feels both fake and very real at the same time as something is so subtly off. It's a sublime constellation of excellently executed bits working together.

Now look who's back! :) :iconquilesart: is back. :) Inescapably clear and abhorrently accurate. The best illustrations possible for the modern decadence! Lots of other hamburger slogans!
Yeah, there is a element of "come up with something new" but seeing as nothing has changed for the last decade and this isn't supposed to be a revelation it's still good to see people able to capture it for as long as it continues. The mighty It that's going on. I don't know, but the art is speaking and I'd like to listen. Problem is I need to think as well. Boo...

I'm ashamed to say I almost forgot :iconthewyvernsweaver: This will be the last one though.
The Weaver is the maker of Zootopia Sunderance. By far the best noir take on Zootropolis since Zistopia. I love the darkness of it and the cheesy lone honourable warrior storyline, and a part of me keeps pocking at my consciousness, going "why on Earth would foxes rule Zootopia?", but I silence that part by remembering in the movie sheep ruled Zootopia for a brief moment.
Judy has suddenly shown herself to be a bit more than a emotionally cold lawyer and naive country bunny and shown just a bit of desperation and fear as she questioned why Nick killed their attacker when he was already defeated. After this she again needs to reaffirm their trust between one another.
I like this rendition of Judy. To say she's holding up a mask seems a bit unfair and a more accurate explanation is unlike most lawyers she has a sense of right and wrong she believes in strongly but there is more to her than that of a 2-dimensional heroine. She still needs to hold that back the same way all of us sometimes need to hold back all of what we are and instead only be one thing. I'm more concerned with Nick who, since the first chapter hasn't shown himself to be an inch more than a empty soldier. I want to see more of what is driving him to defy the city he believes is going to devour Judy and protect her and I have the sens already has broken him in some sense.

Untitled-1 by IchorData


Real name: Classified by SÄPO.
Artist | Student | Traditional Art
My real name is not Viktoria Rosén. Let's get that out of the way. All the implications of that I leave to you to figure out. All great artists have a stage name or an alter ego or a psuedonym, and that's mine.
I am not a great artist and I don't want to be one either for the very simple reason - artists are no better than orthodox religious people, from the nihilistic Buddhists to the inbred Creationists. I am here to become better at my Craft and document the process along the way as well as make a name for myself, but do not ever delude yourself into thinking I'm an artist. To be clear, I define an artist as someone who does something inteligent and mistakable for original in a creative way for his/her own sake without any kind of pragmatic reason, and since DA hardly has a single person matching that description I figure it's as good a place as any to start. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying there's anything wrong in being an artist, I'm just saying I don't want to be an artist because I find no satisfaction in that thinking.
I am here to develop and hone above all my ability as an illustrator - find my style, learn to work creatively, do it proficiently, which means I want criticism for all my work. What was good, what was bad, how you liked it.
The reason is I am developing the base for a longer series or of novels based in a futuristic Cthulhu cycle exploring themes of independence, religion, personality, power, evil and goodness, all set within a erotic sci-fi/fantasy drama called "Who Durst Defy", and while I am driven I am far from near being able to pull that off. That's the main reason why I want to hone my artistic ability, but more than that I have discovered I have a generally creative mind and feel good when I do creative things such as write or draw and I would rather do that than anything else the average drone's life has to offer. I don't want to do this to make money (I am not that stupid) but I want to get by on it one day.
Most obvious things you'll learn about me is I am a nyctophile, meaning I find alot more comfort in darkness than in light, and I am an anthropomorphile, a faculty term I've invented meaning "a strong, passionate, sexual as well as spiritual desire and/or connection to a entity defineable as more than human" but that does not mean I like Furry. Porn is one thing, a starved woman can't be a picker, but other than that I do not want any connection to Furry as a movement because I do not care for nor follow that style. I draw anthropomorphs, not furry, and there is a difference between the two. Anyone who claims anything different is either living in denial or plain ignorant. Yes, there are similarities, but it's like comparing wolves with those chihuahuas you see in handbags. I've thought a bit about what it is that seperate these two genre's and I think I've come up with a fairly good explanation of the differences between them. Before you read though, let me make it plain I have little against furries as such, I simply want it plain that what I draw isn't furries as such.

1. Furry is a part of Anthropomorphism, not the other way around.

Fred Patten, a historian born in 1940 who have been able to follow the evolution of the genre first-hand, claims it originated at a sci-fi convention in the 1980's, tough furries as we've come to know them has existed since much earlier in the 1900's (take Disney's Robin Hood for example). Anthropomorphism on the other hand is exceedingly much older than any of these examples, and much more diversified. Stories of human-like animals or animals with human minds and reasoning or humans with animalistic features can be found on every continent and in every culture. The Germanic werewolves, the Greek Minotaur, La Belle et la Bête, the Dove of the Old Testament, the Were-lions of Africa, these are just a few of the many.

2. Furries are without exception depicted in a cartoon- or manga style.

By this I mean furry artists generally don't bother with making realistic drawings, they're always stylized, and often in a manner similar to one-another. A common denominator is I have yet to see a furry artist bothering to draw fur, but simply making a field with a few "pointy edges" to give the character a feeling of having fur. If I am unclear as to what I mean with this, the works of Walt Disney, :iconjaynaylor:, Kadath, and :iconkaboozle: ought to clue you in. Now you may point out old depictions of for example werewolves, woodcuts and the like, have a smilar style, to which I say more often than not the entire depiction is given an even fur pattern, and when it's not it's often meant to depict shades, depth, light, et cetera. Another denominator is furries can give human facial expressions no matter how their faces are designed. Of course, animals can do expressions we can interpret as simimilar to our own and it can be argued that furries therefor can do them to, and I could let it slide should it be an expression not unrealistically exaggerated. On a sidenote, furries can pronounce human words and sounds which we know are impossible for animals to replicate with a snout for example.

3. Furries are unimaginative parodies of the entire concept of the borderline between human and animal.
This is probably the most offensive title of the argumentation for where furry ends and anthropomorphism begins but I can explain why it is also very accurate. The Furry fandom is very closed-off if you compare it to the rest of all that anthropomorhism can be. The word "Anthropomorphism" is actually a synonym for "personification" and it applies not just to animals, but everything. Everything not human with human-like features and capabilities is an anthropomorph. Death as a skeleton with a scythe in black robes is a anthropomorph and so is an Easterly wind depicted as a cherub blowing ships across the sea. But for now we'll focus on the animalistic. By "unimaginative" I mean furries are essentially completely human. The one thing seperating a furry and a human is its exotic body. More often than not furries can wear clothes, they can use machines, they have a human society, and they have a human capacity for reasoning and empathy. Anthropomorph's are supposed to be in-between human and animal, and that in itself opens a world of possibilities very rarely utilized in furry. Which brings me to "parody of the concept between human and animal". What I mean by parody is the mocking trivialization of the world of possibility that lie there. "Between human and a human with a nearly human body." It's almost disrespectful. Almost. Anthropomorph's are very rarely not meant to symbolize something, usually that humans are animals in one way or another, which we through-out history have been struggling hard to deny, or put a Devil's stamp on (take the vampire, which is essentially the embodiment of the deadly sins) but it can be so much more and often is.

4. Furries is not taken seriously.

There's a very good reason people mock Furry fandom - it has yet to be depicted in a way that can be taken seriously. You have to admit all in all furry can be split into three undergenre's - porn, childrens TV-series, and minor psuedo-drama's. Furry porn is not taken seriously because it's porn and while porn in itself is often mocked furry can all to easily be interpreted as "beastiality in denial". Kid's TV-series with furries is directed at a very distinct audience - kids. What we like as kids is very rare to like as adults because we are taught to put childish things behind us as we grow older because they're often clashing with reality, which we need to embrace if we are to function in society (we are taught). This I really blaim the most for furries not being taken seriously. Finally, what I mean by "psuedo-drama's" is a general drama that not only isn't very good, but could function just as well with humans as with furries, because all characters are essentially humans with fur. Anthropomorph's aren't taken very seriously either, but it is mocked to a much smaller degree than furries. I think the reason is because everything I have already argumented - anthropomorphic animals are in total percieved as more realistic in depiction as well as mentality and nature.

Of course, this is just a generalization and depictions of furry/anthropomorphism often cross these lines in one way or another. These are just a few rules of thumb that I have written down to help maintain the distinction.
"I'll never ask you to trust me, just listen to what I say."
- Viktoria Rosén
And there isn't much more to it than that.

Basically I have completely lost the plot. No idea what I'm doing, got no structure or clear endgame at all. Been feeling afraid and and anxious about my work, even more so about keeping up to date with other people's work, just sealing myself off from the outside like a pretty little blue clam. A lot of self-doubt and a consuming need to do work but not able to see a full picture, uphold process or structure, resulting in little to trash.

Either way, I figure the best way to get out of it is to keep moving my hand while thinking about what I want to get out of my art, and think of how not to be so afraid of every part of it. And make myself get back to keeping up with the peeps whose work I do enjoy.



Add a Comment:
FabioListrani Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch! :D ...have a nice weekend! :ahoy:
IchorData Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Thank you and you're welcome. It's a fascinating style to me, the way you only seem to use computer models without painting them over. It makes them look like stills from a game or, as thumbnails, movie posters with a somewhat art nouveu feel to them. Also, they look a bit like certain romantic paintings I've seen, and to get that traditional feel from something as modern as CG is very interesting.
thewolfcreek Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2016  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you for the fav...
IchorData Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
You're welcome.
gusavancini Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Professional Photographer
Thanks for the fave :)
IchorData Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
You're welcome.
vesssel Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015
Thanks for the fave! Feel free to check out my Facebook page for more art. :D
IchorData Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
You are welcome.
AraNaja Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2015   General Artist
Thanks for the fav :)
IchorData Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
You are welcome.
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